If You Love Somebody, Set Them Free.

Okay, yes those are lyrics to a 1985 Sting song, but they rang oh so true today when I came across a quote on my igoogle page. I have a daily literary quote rss feed on my google homepage. Yesterday, it featured a quote from American Poet, Mary Oliver and all I could think about after reading it was, "that lady must have kids."

The quote went something like this:

"To live in this world, you must be able to do three things: to love what is mortal; to hold it against your bones knowing your own life depends on it; and, when the time comes to let it go, to let it go."

I hate to reveal that it was only after watching "Benjamin Button" recently that I first had a paralyzing realization that I was indeed mortal. No, I didn't think that I was a superhero or a downy white unicorn bathed in light before watching the film, I just hadn't really given it much thought.

It wasn't until seeing poor ol' Benji aging in reverse--from a wrinkled and crippled infant to a wrinkled and crippled old man--that I truly came face-to-face with the fact that I am nurturing the next generation--someone who will only be budding into puberty just as I will be waning into the second half of life. I will be gray and he will be pimply. I will be mom and he will be my rebellious teen. I will be Grandma and he will be Dad. I will be a memory and he will be Grandpa.

Your 20's aren't really a time when you waste much energy thinking about your inevitable and eventual end--you are just beginning what will hopefully be a long and successful life as an adult. Not even turning 30 this year changed all of that. Having a baby did, however.

Now, several times a day, I am saddened by the reality of time's quick passing.

At nights when I am rocking my sweet suckling baby as he drinks and sniffles at my breast, I already envision the time, not very far off from now, when those gentle quiet moments of pure raw love and mutual dependence will come to an end.

And my breast will eventually return to me. And from my breast, I will have to let him go. On to a sippy cup. On to a big boy cup. On to a fork and spoon.

While my eye is pressed to the camera's viewfinder, I can feel time ticking each minute into the past and imagine Dean, myself and Noah Finn years from now watching what I am recording at that moment--laughing at our "dated" hair styles, cars, furniture, clothes--things which are for us now new and modern.

And, our home will return to us. And from our home, we will have to let him go. On to college. On to his own home. On to his own life.

There will come a time that I will have to let him go--let him flutter on without my constant guidance, nurturing, or intervention. And the time is coming sooner rather than later. The independence has already begun. I am preparing now for the"letting go".

Rugrat.

Introducing "Feeding Little Foodies"!

My dear sweet friend, Carrie, has inspired me! I took her advice and have begun my own baby food making workshop . . . and well, here is the announcement that I will be selflessly promoting to every mom, mommy group and local mommy store that I know. I was also thinking of posting it at our local Whole Foods and Trader Joe's stores?!

In addition to the workshops, I have also launched a companion Feeding Little Foodies blog that will serve as the workshops' web page, as well as, an online baby food making resource for all parents.

Please spread the word, add the new blog to your "favorites" and don't forget to "follow" it too!

The first "Little Foodie Feasts" workshop has been scheduled for next month. The announcement is below for you to pass along to anyone you may know in the greater Los Angeles area . Cross your fingers that it will be a success!

"I am a first time mommy. I am a homemade baby food enthusiast. I am a former teacher and a lover of fresh organic produce. Put all of these together and you get an enthusiastic teacher of organic and homemade baby food making!

Making your very own incredibly delicious and nutritious homemade baby food from fresh and organic fruits and vegetables is easier and more fun than you think--and, it is incredibly rewarding knowing that you are filling your little one's tummy with fresh, wholesome, pesticide-free and incredibly pronounceable ingredients.

Please join me for my first baby food making workshop called "Little Foodie Feasts" at my house on Tuesday, August 11th at 1:00 p.m.

If you have any interest in making your own fresh organic homemade baby food for your little one but don't know how to begin, are intimidated by the mere mention of it, or feel as if it would be too much work/money/time, then this workshop is for you!

The workshop will include the following:

• demonstration from start to finish
• sample menus
• sample recipes
• sample feeding schedule
• tricks and tips for making, spicing, storing and freezing
• gear overview (what you'll need)
  
• your own container of pureed food to take home with you!
• discussions with other moms about common concerns/fears/anxieties/problems with starting solids

Feel free to bring your little one. I will have a fellow mom there to "keep an eye" on the kiddies. We have a padded playmat with tons of books and toys to share for your wee one's entertainment while you stick your head in the kitchen for the pureeing fun!

If you are interested, please RSVP by Tuesday, August 4th!

For more information, please visit my blog at www.feedinglittlefoodies.blogspot.com.

I hope to see you all there!"

All In A Good Day's Play: 4th Edition.

A little late, but better late than never! Here's our fourth weekly installment of, "All In A Good Day's Play"--a post where I chronicle, once a week, our day in snapshots!

Our Friday in snapshots:

• 6:45 a.m.--morning snuggles with Papa
  
• 7:15 a.m.--playing on the playmat with Mommy while listening to "Sesame Street Sings the ABC's"
• 9:00 a.m.--morning nap in the crib
• 11:00 a.m.--jogging in the park with Papa
• 12:30 p.m.--a yummy lunch of sweet potatoes, green beans and papaya
• 1:10 p.m.--snuggletime with mama on the bed--including lots of giggles and drool
• 1:30 p.m.--afternoon napping with mommy
• 3:30 p.m.--playdate at Asami & Kai's house
• 6:30 p.m.--walked over to listen to jazz and picnic on the grass at the L.A. County Museum of Art (not pictured because mommy left the camera at Asami's house--drats!)

Sweet Barley Potato Balls.

I got this great finger food recipe off of wholesomebabyfood.com this morning. I think that I am going to make them this weekend--they sound absolutely delicious! Plus, for whatever reason we have an overstock of sweet potatoes. I'll let you know how they turn out!

Sweet Barley Potato Balls

Ingredients:

• 1 cup soft cooked pearled barley (not pureed)
• 1 cup cooked sweet potatoes
• 1/2 cup apple or peach puree
• pinch of cinnamon, ginger, nutmeg as desired

Directions:

• Mix all ingredients together in a bowl.
• Shape into small bite sized balls or plops for a nice baby finger food.

Can be used as finger food or as a meal for "pinching" and spoon practice.

For more foodie tips and tricks, please visit my other blog, feeding little foodies!

Feeding Our Little Foodie: Part 2.

It seems that in addition to going ga ga for gear, mamas also like to chat sustenance. Once the boob or bottle gets it's walking papers (or more likely, bathroom pass, if you're like me and plan to nurse into early toddlerhood) at around 6 months of age, the bright, colorful and beautiful world of food suddenly opens up for both mama and baby.

It is extremely exciting--but it can also be very overwhelming. As regular readers of this blog know, I make all of Noah Finn's babyfood at home using fresh, organic fruits and vegetables. And, I want to make it one of my blog's missions to convince other moms out there, whether they're on the fence about making their own babyfood or entirely opposed to it, that it really isn't so hard and that the incredibly delicious, nutritious and loving results are well worth the time.

For all of you moms out there who may be looking for an idea or two--and to follow up last week's foodie post--here's another menu of the large two week or so batch that I prepared tonight:

• green beans with fresh garlic
• curried peas
• plums
• papaya
• carrots with a little fresh ginger
  
• prunes & bananas
  
• nectarines
• pumpkin with a dash of freshly grated cinnamon

I dabbled briefly with explaining my process last week, but if anyone would like for me to go into more detail, I'd be happy to--anything to get you started! Otherwise, as I have already mentioned, wholesomebabyfood.com has been an incredibly valuable reference as has the book, "Super BabyFood" by Ruth Yaron.

So, happy puréeing. If you haven't already, give it a try! If you're an old pro, please feel free to share any yummy recipes that have been successful with your little one--I am always looking for fun new flavorful ideas!

Beach Bums.

We beached it today. Yup, Daddy had a middle of the week day off and it was fabulous!

But, we don't have a single photo to show for it. Nope. Mama left the camera's memory card in the card reader at home plugged into the computer. So . . . no pictures of Noah ingesting massive quantities of sand--and loving it!--no pictures of the incredibly random and quirky pumpkin patch in someone's yard just one block from the beach, no pictures of our nifty new beach umbrella, no pictures of Noah's belly folding over the top of his swim trunks, or of him bare bumming it in the surf, or of him and Daddy rolling in the sand, or, or, or. Oh, well. I guess I'll always have this post to serve my memory.

Yay, for fun summertime family beach days AND video cameras. We did get a few minutes of footage . . . before the battery died.

When Baby Advice Goes Wrong. Seriously Wrong.

This is going to be a long one folks.

Where have I been? Living under a rock? Well, yes, kind of--I have an infant--same thing. But, still . . . how have I not been following the controversy surrounding Babywise? Seriously.

I stumbled upon a post about it today on SortaCrunchy's blog. Trying to find out what all the fuss was about, I Googled it, of course, and was shocked (to say the least) by what I found.

The book's "Product Description" on Amazon refers to the concepts found in the book as "Infant Management". Infant management!? Seriously? What the hell is that? The word "managing" near the word "baby" sort of replaces the warm and fuzzies with an image of a cold and tinny dictator waving a bull whip near a nest of baby chicks.

It continues by stating that the book is "an alternative to sleepless nights and fussy babies." Isn't that what babies naturally do? Seriously. They can't talk. My friend Asami told me that in Japan they have a one word sentiment that means "babies cry at night" and that Japanese people often refer to the first year with baby by using this word. Why? Because that's what babies do. The first year of life is wrought with jarring and tumultuous change and crying is the only way that babies can express their concern, or worry, or angst, or pain, or hunger.

And don't think I don't know what it's like not to sleep. I have a seven month old insomniac who hasn't caught more than an hour or two at a time of shut eye since the day he was born. I know. I so know. But, I am mom. I will mother and nurture and care for and parent him until he is old enough to sleep through the night and explain his woes through language rather than tears at 3 a.m. Am I tired? Yes. But, sleepless nights and fussy babies are part and parcel to parenting. It's the contract you signed when you made the kid bargain.

I saved the best for last. The description also claims that the book's methods aim to free parents who are "enslaved to the infant's unknown needs". Okay, hold the freakin' diaper cream. Enslaved? Unknown needs? Seriously? I'd rather refer to it as feeding my baby who has not yet learned the skill of lifting fork to mouth. I'd rather refer to it as removing the poop from the butt crack of my child who has not yet learned to control his bowels. I know what he needs and I intend to give it to him.

Point in short--I have never seen more terrifying words in the same sentence as the word "baby". What are these people thinking? This "so called sleep training method" completely removes nurturing from mothering and mothering from parenting and parenting from raising a child.

The most shocking of all is the description of the book and it's author, Gary Ezzo, given on Christianity Today--which is uber interesting as the book, it seems, is most popular among Christians.

"A central element of Ezzo's plan in Babywise is feeding newborns on a firm schedule, controlled by parents, rather than "on-demand," whenever a newborn seems hungry. Ezzo says his parent-directed method is essential to develop respectful, obedient, and godly children. Yet many breast-feeding mothers report that they have been unable to produce an adequate milk supply when following the program according to Matthew Aney, a California pediatrician.

A major focus of Babywise is to get infants to sleep all night as soon as possible. But some pediatricians, when comparing newborns whose parents use Ezzo's guidelines to other infants, have noted a higher incidence of inadequate weight gain, dehydration, and failure to thrive. Critics also sharply question other Babywise emphases, such as introducing a form of spanking in children younger than 2 (CT, Nov. 13, 2000, p. 70)."

Before I burst a blood vessel, I am going to close with the comment that I left for SortaCrunchy in response to her post and her other reader's comments. You'll notice my very agreeable and restrained tone. I posted it before I researched "Babywise". Nevertheless, it still holds true and it is a lot more eloquent than the above enraged babbling. And someone, please tell me that I've got this all wrong. Please tell me that I have gravely misunderstood an otherwise innocuous guide that simply offers gentle suggestions for helping your baby sleep more soundly at night. Please tell me that people don't actually envision parenting this way. Please tell me.

"Other than reading the post and comments, I have no personal experience with Babywise. But I do know that as a new parent, we can all use a little guidance . . . knowing where to find it, however, isn't always easy.

My husband and I have discovered the joys of "Attachment Parenting". It, so far, has provided us with a guide for a gentle, natural and rewarding parenting style. It's a "philosophy" that really only puts in print what most mothers already inherently know . . . go to your baby when he needs you to be there, hold your baby when he wants to be held, soothe your baby when he needs to be soothed--love your baby when he wants to be loved.

I don't believe that the answers to parenting can be found in a book. Parenting is not black and white enough to put in print. Rigid rules and dogmatic directions sour the natural instinct that a mother has for caring for her baby.

Following instincts and receiving a little bit of guidance when that instinct clouds from time to time is our chosen path . . . and so far, so good."

Can't Live Without, Or Always Leave Without.

I have noticed that baby gear talk frequently dominates my various mom group conversations. Whether it be bib babble, carrier comparison, or diaper debates, us mamas always go ga ga for gear. And it is no surprise that we do, either. Other than our babies, there are not many other things that we spend as much time with during the first year, than the things that we use to care for our babies.

So, as a way to provide what is hopefully valuable information to my fellow gear-monger-mommy readers while still managing to dish out Noah news for family, I've decided to start another series of posts called "Can't Live Without, Or Always Leave Without". In these posts I will dish out my two cents--more or less give my humble opinion about--gear that we have used and/or have owned (how it washed . . . or didn't wash, how it assembled . . . or fell apart, how Noah loved it . . . or hated it).

Each item will either be deemed as "can't live without"--because of its ability to in some way make caring for our little Noah Finn a little rosier and we, therefore, never leave the house without it--or "always leave without"--because of its inability to in some way impress us and we, therefore, always leave it at home.

I hope that this series will provide moms, both new and savvy, a little glimpse of other products that they may want to try or buy.

So, check back soon for my first post of the series, and please share your thoughts and own gear experiences . . . because, as a mom, I am always up for good gear gab!

DirectionLESS.

I am without direction. Not in life, but in my car. I have a cruddy internal compass and I am easily distracted. These two qualities combined make for a very unsuccessful 4-wheeled voyage.

Imagine this: It's hot. It's summertime in Los Angeles. Your air is working and its working hard. You have "Sesame Street Sings the Alphabet" CD on repeat to soothe your sweaty screaming infant in the backseat. You're late, again, and you realize you've passed the street you were looking for . . . again. You're stuck in traffic. You give up. You pull to the side of the road to console your baby and . . . yourself. You eat the plate of cookies intended for the playdate--the one you'll never make it to.

Poor Noah Finn.

My husband must get on average, at least five panicked, frustrated or sobbing (it depends on the day) calls a month from me pleading for him to stop what he's doing at work and Google map me to my destination. It doesn't happen often, but every once in a blue moon, he doesn't answer--he's busy (imagine that, he's at work!). And then I call my dad. My dad lives 3,000 miles away in North Carolina.

The thing is, we have lived in California for almost 10 years now. That's no sneeze in the familiarity bucket. That's a decade's worth of burning rubber on southern California's potholed and pathetically congested paths of earthquake cracked asphalt. Why can't I find my way?

I know where I am going most of the time, but I just cannot reliably seem to always get myself there.

Does this direction dilemma sound familiar to anyone? Please say yes, then I won't feel so . . . lost.