You Know You're A New Mommy When . . .

• your favorite local public radio station has been replaced with Coldplay renditions of lullabies and muzak versions of nursery rhymes (and unfortunately, he likes the muzac nursery rhymes best)
• you discover the "tiny tot trio" (dried slobber, spit up and poop) on your favorite "dry clean only" sweater AFTER you've arrived at your destination
  
• you notice your bouncing the bag of apples on your hip as you wait in the grocery store check out line
• your pillow is an exotic vacation destination you'd love to visit one day
• you are lucky if you get one shower a day--and NEVER get two
• you host your first "PG-rated" party ever--a BBQ in the middle of the afternoon on a Saturday at a park featuring other couples with kids . . . and it's your 30th birthday
  
• your cuticles have grown over your fingernails
• your milk-stained nursing bra is your sexiest piece of lingerie
• "mommy and daddy time" means falling asleep on the couch together
  
• you've purchased so much under-eye concealer that the makeup counter lady knows you by first name and your credit card number by heart
• you can only identify that lady you met last week by the name of her kid
• a wild Saturday night means managing to stay awake long enough to catch the opening monologue of "Saturday Night Live"
  
• you truly consider doing chores while dad watches the baby taking a break
• you discover that breast pads double perfectly as drink coasters
  

And, lastly, you know your a new mommy when . . . you wouldn't trade any of the above for anything else in the whole wide world.